this is your warning to never cry in front of me because one time my friend came up to me looking super sad so I asked him what was wrong and he literally was like my dog it passed away ...

listen there’s only one pack of Skittles it belongs to me I have seniority I’m done with this as long as I get something okay you always get nothing something or nothing is still nothing Bo there’s only one so ...

oh sorry sorry honey sorry what year is it 1987 the’80s are almost over and I haven’t even tried Coke yet I’m looking for Pam Hughes hi and she’s probably at school I’ll give you a ride but you get ...

is uh What uh what’s What’s Happening Here something wrong with your sandwich why is the why is the meat on the outside cuz it’s a sandwich no the bread is supposed to be on the outside what like bread ...

what’s your name Cowboy your name is Cowboy we all Cowboys the hell you are and you you had a horse like a teenager bouncing up and down wide ey stun you even doing it at all the only cowboy ...

see when it comes to the bedroom the game always came up a little bit short my God maybe it was not so much that it was the game that was short maybe it was that the field I was ...

can I help you we got a noise complaint you’ve been playing loud music for hours sorry just blowing off a little scheme we were’re just having a little fun no harm in that right depends on what kind of ...

welcome one and all in here out there Mr and Mrs America all the ships at Sea to The Late Show I’m your host step colar and folks I don’t want to start off by saying I you know I’ve ...

thank you for watching thank you for joining us here on another crazy day in the United States uh you know we get a lot of people watching this show on YouTube from around the world and for those who ...

Welcome to The Daily Show. I’m Desi Lydic. We’ve got a great show for you tonight. Kamala Harris drops her medical records. Donald Trump throws a one-man dance party, and Lewis Black tells undecided voters where they can shove their ...

y’all this cannot be real what the look on her face is making me curious K Kentucky stay Fair okay why does this look so familiar why is there ass inprints bro why why is this so familiar

you got it got it you Big Daddy thank you thank you I’m dismissed I mean I didn’t say you was dismissed but you can go to the left if you want to be I’m going to go to the ...

I got a girlfriend now sorry fellas um I was doing Tinder for a while and Tinder makes you pick like a whole bunch of hobbies and interests that show up on your profile so Tinder gives you a big ...

hey check it out I wouldn’t mind driving that over a prairie dog Village huner the driver Martin what’s a tool like you doing on something cool like that I’m operating a combine harvester it’s part of my duties as ...

we have to win like you won in the charity football match right oh wait no you didn’t win no that’s oh you want to be funny now Nick let’s be real here Nick please don’t swear Nick what girl ...